Lululemon goes public

It was bound to happen... Lululemon is going public! They are hoping to get around 200 million in a public offering of stock and will be listed on the TSX. Hahaha... more opportunities for me to post on my blog about it! I have been pretty vocal about my strong dislike for this company and their crazy "marketing" shenanigans. But mostly because of me and me being stupid enough to wait in line for a couple hours in the freezing cold to go to a sale, and not even lining up long enough to get in! Never again, and don't you try either! I'm warning you!
Anyways, they have nice stuff, but it's too pricey for casual/work out clothes in my opinion. I'd rather spend more on formal clothes. But maybe it's because I don't really work out. I'd rather take walks outside or in malls! Heh heh heh.

Lululemon just kills me. I have decided to write them a letter offering my comments on their "manifesto".

Dear Lululemon,

After going through you website, I have decided that I would like to offer some comments regarding your "manifesto". I believe, it is in your best interest to seriously consider some minor adjustments if you will, so your brand can remain at the forefront of yogian fashion for years to come. I suspect many more potential customers and investors alike will be drawn to your website since there is news that you will be going public and it is your corporate responsibility to write the best manifesto possible to get the most number of customers to buy your yogian garments that are known to make the derriere so the much more superior. I have bracketed my comments after each line of the manifesto.

• Drink FRESH water and as much water as you can. Water flushes unwanted toxins and keeps your brain sharp. (Really? Have they done a randomized controlled trial? References please.)
  
• Observe a plant before and after watering and relate the benefits to your body and brain. (Wow, that is so cheesy.)
  
• Coke, Pepsi and all other pops will be known as the cigarettes of the future. Colas are NOT a substitute for water. Colas are just another cheap drug made to look great by advertising. (I wouldn't go that far to call it a "drug". Sure, it's bad for you, but colas do not in any way fall under the definition of "drug" as defined in the Food and Drugs Act in Canadian legistlation. "Drugs do not include any substance... food, drink or cosmetic, or any substance in Schedules A or B." If it was even colloquially a "drug", a more specific term would be "drug of abuse".)
  
• Be yoga. Breathing has you live in the moment and stretching releases toxins from your muscles. (No, I don't think so! Someone should do a Medline search!)
  
• Do yoga so you can remain active in physical sports as you age. (And can buy more lululemon clothes!)
  
• Listen, listen, listen, and then ask strategic questions. (This, I actually agree with. Though some questions are not necessarily "strategic". Some are just stupid. I should know!)
  
• SWEAT once a day to regenerate your skin. (Sweat sometimes causes acne if your face or body isn't washed shortly thereafter, right Debra?)
  
• Compliments from the heart elevate another person’s spirit and will often result in an encouraging word for someone else ... a domino effect. (Agreed.)
  
• Your outlook on life is a direct reflection of how much you like yourself. (Maybe... but is it a causal effect or a correlation? Hmmm.)
  
• Life is full of setbacks. Success is determined by how you handle setbacks. (True.)
  
• Write down your short and long term GOALS four times a year. 2 personal, 2 business and one health goal. A university found only 3 percent of the students had written goals. 20 years later, the same 3 percent were wealthier than the other 97% combined. (Agreed. Do it! I find it keeps you more focused on your goals and what kind of person you want to be/become.)
  
• You ALWAYS have choice and the conscious brain can only hold one thought at a time. Choose a positive thought. (Agreed.)
  
• Communication is COMPLICATED. Each person is raised in a different family with a different definition of each word. (True.)
  
• Love. (True. But find someone who loves you back.)
  
• Jealousy works the opposite way you want it to. (I don't get this one. How is someone supposed to use jealousy to work for them? Make someone like them more? Still don't get it. I think I'm even more confused now.)
  
• Nature wants us to be mediocre because we have a greater chance to survive and reproduce. Mediocre is as close to the bottom as it is to the top. Be creative. Do one thing a day that scares you. (True. But I think "scare" is too strong a word. Maybe "uncomfortable, but in a good way!" would be better. But I guess that doesn't have the same flow as "scare". Boo.)
  
• Take various vitamins. You never know what small mineral can eliminate the bottleneck to everlasting health. (I don't think this is a wise decision. It's better to have a good diet and to follow the Canadian Food Guide. Supplement only when you have a deficiency and talk to your pharmacist or physician before you start on it if you can! And please don't believe the junk on herbals. They can interact with other medications and most don't work! Check out www.camline.ca for more information. Sorry, had to plug it, I just had to. That's what working on a review for 3 months does to you.)
  
• Dance, sing, floss and travel. (Maybe... I agree about the flossing, I have narsty plaque when I don't. Aren't you glad I tell you this stuff? Yeeeah. But it's fun to be right at home too. I always find I love coming home after being outside the city and I appreciate it more.)
  
• Do not use cleaning chemicals on your kitchen counters. Try vinegar and lemon. Someone will inevitably make a sandwich on your counter. (Well, I'd rather use chemicals than get food poisoning by E. coli, but this comment is understandable. I would use alcohol instead of vinegar though. It can kill some viruses too. Uetrecht said so.)
  
• Just like you did not know what an orgasm was before you had one, nature does not let you know how great children are until you have them. Children are the orgasm of life. (I'm not sure whether I should be sickened by this one or not. (Thinking, thinking... yes, I definitely should be sickened). "Orgasm" and "children" shouldn't be in the same sentence. Ever. Oh, nooo... Michael Jackson joke coming... No, I can't! Too, too easy!)
  
• Friends are more important than money. Don’t trust that an old age pension will be sufficient. (Duh, of course it's not going to be enough. That's why you should save for retirement and invest early, so you don't end up po'.)
  
• Live near the ocean and inhale the pure salt air that flows over the water. Vancouver will do nicely. Stress is related to 99% of all illnesses. (Well, maybe, but what kind of stress? Oxidative stress? This one needs further clarification and further references. We are evidence-based here at FFAC.)
  
• One hour of aerobic exercise will release endorphins to regenerate cells and offset stress. (See above.)
  
• A daily hit of athletic induced endorphins will give you the power to make better decisions and help you be at peace with yourself. (See above.)
  
• Wake up and realize you are surrounded by amazing friends. (But what if you have sucky friends that stop talking to you for months after helping them get through a rough patch? Are those "amazing friends"? Just saying! They're out there, I suppose.)
  
• lululemon athletica was formed to provide people with components to live a longer, healthier and more fun life. If we can produce products to keep people active and stress free, we believe the world will be a better place. (But your clothes are so expensive! What if someone if working so hard trying to keep up with your fashions that it is *gasp* CAUSING their stress? How can you forgive yourself, lululemon? How coooould you?)
  
• Do it now. The world is changing AT SUCH A RAPID rate that waiting to implement changes will leave you two steps behind. DO IT NOW, DO IT NOW! (That's true. No time like the present).

So as you can see, I have thought long and hard about your manifesto and though your current version needs some work, it is definitely a good start. I hope you take into consideration my comments and I hope you will update your website shortly.

Sincerely,
Terri of FFAC